The Foundation of the Home (1)

The Meaning of Spirit-Filling

(Eph. 5:18)

And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit;

We now enter the sixth major section of the latter part of Paul’s Epistle to the Ephesians (chs. 4-6). Thus far we have seen that there are five things involved in our “Walk In Christ.”

Doctrine and Duty in Ephesians

THE DUTY	THE DOCTRINE
Walk in unity (4:1‑16)	1:22-23; 2:16,21-22; 3:6
Walk in purity (4:17‑32)	1:4
Walk in love (5:1‑7)	3:17-19
Walk in light (5:8‑14)	1:18
Walk in wisdom (5:15‑17)	1:8,17; 3:10
Walk in submission (5:18‑6:9)	3:8
Walk in victory (6:10‑20)	1:19-21

We come now to the sixth, Walk In Submission (5:18-6:9). As with each of the subjects in these chapters, we see here that the duty is based on the doctrine that is found in chapters 1-3. The doctrine on which this section is based appears in 3:8, where Paul writes that he is “less than the least of all saints,” a statement that truly summarizes the Apostle Paul. In him we see a graphic picture of humility and submission. As we’ll see, submission is not just for wives (v. 22) but for everyone (v. 21).

Introduction to the Christian Home

We cannot help but stop in wonder at the verse before us: And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit. It is, of course, a well-known verse, but it is a verse we should linger over constantly. It is verse that will dictate how successfully and victoriously we will live our Christian lives.

Ephesians 5:18 actually begins the context on the Christian home. Some Bible teachers begin a study of the Christian home in verse 22, that well-known verse about the submission of the wife to the husband. But to do so is serious error, an error not only in doctrinal exposition, but in practical application as well. Beginning in verse 22 will do little but create rebellious wives. Further, not beginning in verse 18 will bring about a warped family life in general. Verse 18 lays the foundation of each family member first being Spirit-filled and then seeing our roles as husbands and wives.

We can go still further to say that all of the book of Ephesians is essential to the proper family life. Is not unity an essential element in the home? Is not purity an essential element of marriage? Is not love essential? Is it not necessary that each family member be walking according to light? Is not the same fact true of walking in wisdom? May we say again, how foundational the Epistle to the Ephesians is!

As we begin our study of the most important passage in God’s Word concerning the Christian home, let us consider two introductory thoughts.

First, there is a “revolution” going on in America today. The word “revolt” means “an uprising against authority, a rebellion, protest, or insurrection.” The revolution going on today is against the authority of the Word of God, and there is truly no better example of this uprising than when it comes to the home. It is common knowledge that one out of two marriages ends in divorce. A little research on this is truly enlightening and saddening. Looking at it on a per capita or percentage basis, the U.S. divorce rate for 2000 was 41% per capita per year, according to the National Center for Health Statistics. This is made even more significant, however, by the fact that this rate is only for the states that keep track of the number of divorces—California, Colorado, Indiana and Louisiana do not. In contrast to this rate, the Census Bureau consistently reports that the rate is closer to 50%.

Looking at the raw numbers is even more dramatic. The total number of marriages in the year 2000, for example, was 2,355,005—including the states that don’t report divorce numbers. Out of that number, there were 957,200 divorces, which is 40.6%—but again, excluding the states that don’t report divorce numbers. Another interesting statistic I found was that as of the year 2000, 18.5 percent of the US population is divorced (11,317,572). By gender, it’s: 8,572,000 males (8.3%) and 11,309,000 females (10.2%).

One other statistic, which actually is not about divorce specifically, but is another indication of America’s moral decline is that as of the year 2000, there were 3.8 million couples cohabiting outside of marriage, which obviously translates to 7.6 million people living in open sin outside of marriage.

Still further, however, only God knows how many couples are divorced in mind even though they occupy the same house. Why is that true? Some give answers such as, “They just need to better communicate with one another,” or, “They just need to understand and tolerate each other’s unique qualities,” or other such statements.

Now while such statements certainly have an element of truth in them, they all still miss the point. The reason why marriages fail and homes are in turmoil is because people are not governed by the Word of God. Whether the marital problem comes in the form of money, communication, sexual dysfunction, or any number of other things, these are only symptoms of the real problem. The Word of God is NOT the final authority for home life in America, and sad to say, this is true of many Christians.

This leads us to the second statement we need to consider, namely, if we want a home that is Biblical and one that God will bless, we must turn to Scripture alone as our guide. Much of what is taught today concerning the home, and each member of the home, comes from the world. Frankly, many “Christian” books on the home are quite inadequate because they are either completely topical in their approach instead of expositional, or they are clouded by the world’s philosophies, or both.[1] Instead of simply dealing with what God says about the roles of husbands, wives, and children, such books repackage Freudianism or other psychological philosophy.

Our goal here, then, is to be thoroughly biblical in our study. This section is not only an in-depth exposition and application of Ephesians 5:18-6:9, but is also an exposition of several other key Scriptures that are related to the home.

It is vitally important that Christians become aware that the family is the first and the primary of the three institutions God has created on earth: the family, the church, and human government. This world, however, with its humanistic, man-centered philosophy is trying to destroy all three of those institutions. God has ordained and designed human government to be characterized by freedom and liberty, but liberalism, socialism, communism, despotism, and other philosophies strive to tear down Biblical ethics. The Church is being torn down by the de-emphasizing of the Word of God and by substituting apostasy, religious ritual, and worldly programs. But it is the family that is being attacked with the most violence. This is the most tragic of all because it is the foundational institution of God. It is being attacked by adultery, fornication, permissiveness, homosexuality, abortion, women’s liberation, juvenile delinquency, and humanistic state education. Some Christian leaders teach that the Church is the most important of God’s institutions, but that is not true! If we do not have strong families, we will not have strong churches. The same is also true of our nation. God created the home first; He created it to be the foundation of all else.

The institution of the family is in serious trouble today, and may we say, Christians are not immune. There are many Christian homes today that have serious problems. Why? Because the Word of God is not the authority in that home. It is with those thoughts in mind that we begin our study of what God has designed for the Christian home.

* * *

Before we deal with the responsibilities of each family member, we must first look at something that at first seems quite unrelated. But it is this one thought that forms the entire foundation of a Godly home. This thought is, Spirit-filling, that is, as we’ll see, Spirit-control.

“Spirit-filling” is a much misunderstood subject; there is much false and confusing teaching on this subject. In fact, an entire Charismatic theology has been built on false teaching concerning this passage and others. It is also quite significant that one of the strongest passages (if not the strongest passage) on Spirit-filling is found within the context of the Christian home. Paul is telling us that without Holy Spirit control we will not have a home, only a house with people in it.

In this chapter, and the two that follow, let us note three things about “Spirit-filling:” The meaning of being filled, the manifestations of being filled, and the method of being filled.

I. The Meaning of Being Filled With The Spirit

What Spirit-Filling Is Not

Spirit-filling is not the “sealing” of the Spirit. We studied sealing way back in 1:13 and 4:30. The “seal” pictures the ancient signet ring, which indicated acquisition, absolute ownership, authenticity, and assurance. Neither is Spirit-filling the “baptism” of the Spirit, which we also examined in our study of sealing. This is the placing of the believer into Christ and into His body, the Church. Sealing and baptism are both in the Aorist Tense, which shows a completed, never to be repeated, past action that was done by God; we have nothing to do with either one. But, as we’ll see, “filling” is something in the present; it is a continuous action. Neither is Spirit-filling the same as the “indwelling” of the Spirit. Every believer is indwelt by the Holy Spirit, that is, has the Spirit living within (Rom. 8:9; etc.). Neither is Spirit-filling getting more of the Spirit than what we already have. As Theologian Louis Sperry Chafer puts its, “It is not a matter of acquiring more of the Spirit, but rather of the Spirit of God acquiring all of the individual.”[2] Finally, Spirit-filling is not a rapturous state where you speak in ecstatic language or have visions. None of that is taught in Scripture.

What Spirit-Filling Is

To understand fully Spirit-filling, we must see the contrast between two things here in Ephesians 5:18.

First, Be not drunk with wine in wherein is excess. Now, why would Paul bring up something like this when speaking of such the grand subject of Spirit-filling? We can offer two reasons. One is because nothing in Paul’s day (or ours) was more characteristic of the old man than drunkenness. As one commentator puts it bluntly, “It is perhaps the best example of stupidity. The drunk can’t think straight.”[3] No one is more idiotic, more embarrassing to himself and others than a drunk. Another reason is that in some respects there is a similarity between drunkenness and Spirit-filling, namely, both speak of control. While the drunk is controlled by alcohol and has lost control, the Spirit-filled person is controlled by the Spirit but has not lost control. One commentator says it well:

The filling of the Spirit is contrasted with drunkenness (Ac 2:13). Both wine and the Spirit do their work deep in the human psyche. They affect people below the level of consciousness, down at the foundations of personality. The Spirit is not merely with God’s people but in them. The meaning of the present text is: let all the church, therefore, cooperate with the Spirit who lives down deep in their hearts so they will spontaneously overflow with orderly and joyous worship of God.[4]

While the drunk is stupid and without control, the Spirit-filled Believer is sensible and in control.

To get the full force of the picture Paul paints here, notice first the word drunk. This word was translated “filled” by Wycliffe (1382) showing not a “sip” but being “full.” The Greek is word methuskō, of which one scholar notes, “A curious use of the word occurs in Homer, where he is describing the stretching of a bull’s hide, which in order to make it more elastic, is soaked . . . (methuskō) with fat.”[5] So, the translation could be, “Do not be soaked with wine.”

Paul wasn’t satisfied, however, by saying just drunk, rather drunk in excess. The Greek behind excess (asotia) is an interesting word and refers to more than just the amount consumed. The root is sotia, which in-turn is from sōzō, “to save, deliver, make whole, preserve safe from danger, loss, [and] destruction.”[6] It is used in the theological term “soteriology,” the study of Salvation. When the prefix a is added (the “alpha-negative”), it means the exact opposite, having no safety or deliverance, having no preservation from danger, loss, and destruction. This word is used of the Prodigal Son (Lk. 15:13) who “wasted his substance in riotous living” (emphasis added). Peter used it to describe the old life, “when we walked in lasciviousness, lusts, excess of wine, revellings, banquetings, and abominable idolatries” (I Pet. 4:3, emphasis added). What a picture that is! And drunkenness is right in the middle of it. So the idea of this phrase is, “Do not be soaked with wine which leads to riotous living, wastefulness, and destruction.”

To understand fully what is before us we must examine some history. Unlike us in this century, the Ephesians immediately knew precisely what Paul meant when he used these words because they were familiar with a particular Greek myth. Greek mythology taught that Zeus was the supreme god of the universe. The myth says that he gave birth to a son in a rather unique fashion. His wife Semele, who was actually a mortal, made Zeus appear before her in his divine splendor, but she was consumed by his lightening when he did so. Zeus took the child-god she was carrying and thrust it into his thigh until it was time for it to be born. The infant was then cared for by a band of nymphs. One version of the legend says that the child was kidnapped and murdered by the Titans. Zeus salvaged the heart and the child was soon reborn (“resurrected”) as Dionysus. Dionysus became the god of vegetation and especially the god of wine. Supposedly, he actually invented wine. The worship of this god was characterized by frenzied orgies that were associated with intoxication. The use of phallic symbols, the tearing of wild animals into pieces, the eating of raw flesh, and savage dancing were also practiced, especially in Thrace and Asia Minor (the location of Ephesus). Dionysus later became known as Bacchus, the name by which he was known to the Romans.[7]

Additionally, in the month of Poseidon, there was a festival in honor of Dionysus in Athens. During the three-day spring festival, “everybody was more or less drunk” and “there was a competition in wine drinking.”[8] Alexander the Great held such a contest in which 30 competitors died.[9] I was reminded here of today’s New Year’s Eve parties as well as the deaths of college students during drinking binges.

Drunkenness became the key to the worship of Dionysus, as well as most other pagan gods we might add. Why? For one reason it dulled the senses enough to subdue any guilt which might be felt as a result of sin. In the same way people today use alcohol, drugs, sex, even a vocation to deaden and even bury their consciousness of God. Another reason for the drunkenness of the worshippers was that it gave them a false exhilaration that counterfeited true joy. The same is true today. People think that if they are drunk, they are happy. Many try to stay “high” all the time because when they come down, things look worse than they did before. So then, Paul uses this term “drunk” to show the contrast between the orgies of evil and the sweetness of Spirit-filling. Again, the Ephesians understood the imagery. Of course, they would not get drunk and identify themselves with such pagans. Neither should we ever “lose ourselves” in drink or drugs, rather may we immerse ourselves in the Holy Spirit. This leads us to the next phrase.

Second, Be filled with the Spirit. It’s interesting that Paul doesn’t use methuskō here to say, “Be drunk with the Spirit.” To be filled with the Spirit is not to lose control and be mindless, as is true of some charismatics. There are those today in the “laughing revival” who begin laughing hysterically “in the Spirit” and others who roll on the floor or run around the church building. What is that if not a virtual form of “drunkenness?” While the disciples were accused of having had too much wine one the Day of Pentecost (Acts 2:13), that was only by their critics who were mocking them. Other observers, however, were amazed by what they saw, which was not a frenzy or ecstatic gibberish, rather people who were controlled by the Spirit and coherently proclaimed Christ in human languages they had never spoken before.

This is evident from Paul’s use of the marvelous word pleroō (filled), which speaks of filling a container. As we’ve noted before, it was once used of ships being filled with sailors, rowers, and soldiers and means “to influence fully, to control.” As one Greek authority adds, “To fill up, to cause to abound, to furnish or supply liberally, to flood, to diffuse throughout.”[10] It is used, for example, in Matthew 13:48 to refer to a full fishing net. The chief idea then is that we are to be permeated with, and therefore controlled by, the Spirit. To serve as the first “deacons,” the Apostles looked for “men of honest report, full [plērēs] of the Holy Ghost and wisdom” (Acts 6:3, and Stephen was “full [plērēs] of the Holy Ghost” (Acts 7:55) as he was being stoned to death.

Now, all this is fine in theory, but what does it mean in practice? Preachers often say that “filling” means “control,” but what exactly does that mean? As noted earlier, it’s not a matter of our getting more of the Spirit, but of the Spirit getting all of us. It means that we are influenced by Him and nothing else. The put it succinctly: To be filled with the Spirit is to have our thoughts, desires, values, motives, goals, priorities, and all else set on spiritual things and spiritual growth. When that statement is true of a Christian’s life, all other things will fall neatly into place.

It’s interesting that since some people in the New Testament are referred to as being full of the Holy Spirit, such as the “deacons” of Acts 6:3, there must have been something about them that was recognizable as evidence of Spirit filling. In other words, if people could see that they were spirit-filled, then obviously there were signs that indicated it. What, then, did they see? Can there be any doubt that it was Christ-likeness of character? That is the very essence of Galatians 5:22-23: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.” When these are present in our lives, people will be able to see the control of the Holy Spirit in our lives. They don’t have to see some emotional outburst or ecstatic experience, rather they will see Christ-like behavior.

Further, the tense of the Greek verb is all-important. One of the most prominent misconceptions about Spirit-filling is that it involves some “crisis experience,” some “dramatic event,” some so-called “second blessing,” and is something we only get because we “agonize over it in prayer” for a long period of time. But these ideas could not be further from the Truth; the language of Scripture says none of that. On the contrary, we need not struggle for it, rather simply claim it. The verb here is in the Present Tense, which shows a continuing action. In other words, Spirit-filling is designed to be a continuing reality. A literal translation of the Greek here is, “Be being filled.” We are to be in the state of constantly being filled with the Spirit. Again, we need not struggle for it, rather simply claim it.

Further still, Spirit-filling is, in fact, something we control because the Greek construction is in the Imperative Mood, showing a military command. In other words, Spirit-filling is not optional, rather mandatory. As the preceding verse declares, this is the will of God. God would, therefore, not give us a command unless we were being put in charge of carrying out the command. It is up to us to obey the command of being filled with the Spirit. By way of contrast, “sealing” and “baptism” are done by God, and are therefore in the Aorist Tense. But “filling” is up to us to allow. We will study this in greater depth, but the underlying principle for being filled with the Holy Spirit is yieldedness; we must allow the Holy Spirit to take control. This is further indicated by the verb being in the Passive Voice, that is, the subject being acted upon. We allow the Holy Spirit to act upon us and control us.

How plain all this becomes when we compare drunkenness with Spirit-filling. What a contrast between getting “drunk on wine” and being “filled with the Spirit!” Some people get drunk (or “high”) because it’s fun. They cast off all their inhibitions and let their hair down. But the Spirit-filled Christian allows the Spirit to control his actions and attitudes. Others get drunk to escape the pressures, problems, and perplexities of life. But those same things drive the Sprit-filled Christian closer to the Lord, Who can aid them in dealing with those problems. As John Eadie writes:

This is the contrast. Men are intoxicated with wine, and they attempt to “fill” themselves with it: but they cannot. Wine cannot fulfill their expectation—they cannot live habitually under its power; its fumes are slept away, and new indulgences are craved. The exhilaration which they covet can only be felt periodically, and again and again must they drain the wine cup to relieve themselves of despondency. But Christians are “filled” with the Spirit, whose influences are not only powerful, but replete with satisfaction to the heart of man. It is a sensation of want—a desire to fly from himself, a craving after something which is felt to be out of reach, an eager and restless thirst to enjoy, if at all possible, some happiness and enlargement of heart, that usually leads to intemperance. But the Spirit fills Christians, and gives them all the elements of cheerfulness and peace—genuine elevation and mental freedom—superiority to all depressing influences, and refined and permanent enjoyment. Of course, if they are so filled with the Spirit, they feel no appetite for debasing and material stimulants.[11]

What a contrast! While the drunk can never be filled, the Christian can be.

Ponder also that none of us need fear that “God won’t give me enough of His Spirit.” As John 3:34 declares, “God giveth not the Spirit by measure.” God doesn’t give one Christian a “quart” of the Spirit and another other a “gallon.” He doesn’t measure out the Spirit. Just as God gave the Spirit to His Son without limits, He gives the Spirit to us without limits. As Puritan Matthew Henry wrote, “The Spirit dwelt in him, not as a vessel, but as in a fountain, as in a bottomless ocean.”

Another misconception about Spirit-filling is what exactly it is for, that is, its purpose. There are various viewpoints here, but all one has to do to find the purpose of Spirit-filling is open the book of Acts. There are at least six instances in Acts where people are filled with the Spirit (2:4; 4:8, 31; 7:55; 9:17; 13:9). In every one of those instances the purpose of Spirit-filling was an empowering for service, more specifically, an empowering to be a witness for Christ. That is what Spirit-filling is for today. That is the power spoken of in Acts 1:8: “But ye shall receive power, after that the Holy Ghost is come upon you: and ye shall be witnesses unto me both in Jerusalem, and in all Judaea, and in Samaria, and unto the uttermost part of the earth.” This is the power Paul spoke of to the Corinthian believers, “And my speech and my preaching was not with enticing words of man's wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power” (I Cor. 2:1-5). He likewise wrote to the Thessalonians, “For our gospel came not unto you in word only, but also in power, and in the Holy Ghost, and in much assurance; as ye know what manner of men we were among you for your sake” (I Thes. 1:5).

A wonderful example of this empowering for service is Peter. Rarely do we see the Lord Jesus in the Gospels without Peter tagging along. He wanted to be with the Lord and do what the Lord did. As long as he was with His Lord, he felt invincible. He even drew a sword in the Garden of Gethsemane and was ready to take on all comers (John 18:3–11). But in a matter of hours, when His Lord was gone, Peter’s power and boldness evaporated. He denied even knowing Jesus. But then a strange thing happened a few days later. On the Day of Pentecost, we see that same miserable man preaching boldly without fear or even the slightest hesitation. What made the difference? The answer is found in Acts 4:8. As he stood before the Sanhedrin after being arrested, Luke tells us that Peter was “filled with the Holy Ghost.” His Lord was again with Him in the form of the Holy Spirit who filled and empowered Him for proclamation. Even the members of the Sanhedrin marveled at his boldness (v. 13).

It is that realization of Christ’s presence that leads to a Christ portrait, that is, a Christ-likeness. As Paul wrote to the Corinthians, who certainly needed the exhortation, “We all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord” (II Cor. 3:18). In this way His work, His will, His ways, and His words will become ours.

Harry Ironside makes one more observation about Spirit-filling that we do well to ponder. In the sister book to Ephesians, we read, “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord” (Col 3:16). We should notice here the effect of the Word of God dwelling richly in the soul. When we then turn back to Ephesians, we notice that we get the exact same results in Colossians when the Word of God dwells in us as we get in Ephesians when we are filled with the Spirit. What’s the correlation? Ironside writes:

. . . It should be clear that Word-filled Christian is the Spirit-filled Christian. As the Word of Christ dwells in us richly, controls all our ways, as we walk in obedience to the Word, the Spirit of God fills, dominates, controls to the glory of the Lord Jesus Christ.[12]

That is Spirit-filling. Once again, we see that the Word of God is everything, the key to living the Christian life. That is why Acts 4:31 declares, “And when they had prayed, the place was shaken where they were assembled together; and they were all filled with the Holy Ghost, and they spake the word of God with boldness.” May we repeat: The purpose of Spirit-filling is the empowering to proclaim the Truth of God. Spirit-filling is not what many emphasize today. It is not some emotional high; it is not something by which we “better commune with God;” it is not received through “speaking in tongues;” and it’s not to be found in the emotionalism and entertainment atmosphere of the “seeker-sensitive” movement. The Bible teaches none of that. Rather, we are to be Word-filled and, therefore, Spirit-filled. It is impossible for the Holy Spirit to work in us apart from the Word of God; it is through His Word that God works. It is then, as a result of that work, we are equipped to be more faithful and effective witnesses of Christ. Spirit-filling does not result in some “emotional rapture.” On the contrary, its purpose is to make us more lucid, coherent, in control of our faculties so we may more clearly proclaim the Truth. The preacher is to filled with the Spirit as he bears witness of Christ in his pulpit ministry. Every Christian is to be filled with the Spirit as he witnesses to those with whom he comes in contact every day.

As you apply this to your life, you will see something amazing happen. There will be times when someone will ask you a question and you will give them the answer and then think to yourself, “Where did I come up with that answer?” The Holy Spirit gave it to you. And why did He give it to you? Because you are permeated with the Word of God. That is what our Savior meant when He said, “But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you” (Jn. 14:26). He won’t give you some opinion, some silly cliché, or some psychobabble, rather He will give you the Word of God that you have committed to your mind and heart.

As we close, let us consider why Spirit-filling is so vitally important and pivotal to Christian living. As stated earlier, this verse begins the context of the Christian home, but also the relationship of masters and slaves (what we in our day call “employers and employees”). We see in homes today all manner of problems: rebellious children, harsh parents, unsubmissive wives, unloving husbands, divorce, and much more. In the business world we see cheating workers, unfair employers, strikes, buyouts, monopolies, and the list goes on. And all that is not confined to non-Christians, but appears among Christians. I’ve seen Christian homes that are in shambles and Christian business men who are unethical. What, then, would be the result if every person were Spirit-filled? How would our homes, businesses, and even governments be transformed if the Word of God, energized by the Holy Spirit, ruled? What if every person were Christ-like? Would it not obliterate all conflict, argument, prejudice, and even war itself? Would a Spirit-filled person murder another human being or torture and enslave nations as did Adolph Hitler and Saddam Hussein? Would a Spirit-filled mother or doctor choose to murder an unborn child? Would a spirit-filled citizen accept welfare when he was able to work? Would a Spirit-filled church ever split?

We could, of course, go on for hours with such questions, but the real issue is Spirit-filling. That is precisely why neither the Lord Jesus nor the Apostles ever tried to improve society by dealing with an issue—they dealt with Truth, with Holy Spirit control. When God rules in our lives, all other things will come into line. Preaching against abortion or killing an abortion doctor won’t save anyone, but preaching the Gospel will. It is the Truth that changes lives. Sin is the problem, the Savior is the answer, and the Spirit is the energy.

Dear Christian, are you filled with the Spirit? Do you desire each moment to be filled with the Spirit, filled with His Word?

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